Spending Addiction: Financial Biography, Part 2

This is a continuation of my financial biography. So last I left this thing off, I had just started college with a brand new Discover card.

Obviously if I wasn't good with money beforehand, this wasn't headed in a good direction. Finally being 18 and in control of my finances, I wasted no time in draining every last bit of savings my parents had set up to provide for me. I also ran up my "emergency" card quite a bit. Mostly it went towards pizza, alcohol, drugs-- the typical things one blows one's money on in college.

At the end of my freshman year my dad bailed me out of debt and I started at a new school.

This time it was worse. I was bad at managing the money I got from financial aid and called my dad repeatedly to demand more money. And I pretty much demanded it. I had some jobs through the schools slave labor program (also called "work-study") which involved a lot of being looked down on by pretentious faculty. Eventually I quit the job and just took out more student loans. I sold CDs for a while as well.

I made more bad decisions, loaning some friends a big chunk of cash which they were unable to repay. I also discovered the wonders of designer clothing. I had thought myself pretty cool with my grunge thrift store clothing but suddenly, going out to all these bars with my fake ID, I felt inadequate.

I developed a spending addiction.

Whenever I got a disbursement of money I'd already have spent it three ways-- cash, credit and bills. I opened more and more pre-approved credit cards with the intention of rotating the balance... Only I would just run them up buying more clothes and cologne and CDs and whatever else. Sales agents at the stores knew me by name and I liked being catered to because I was good commission. It was a ritual.

I needed the things I bought to feel good about myself. Plus I was still going out every night drinking. How I managed it for so long is really beyond me. But eventually I started to fall behind. I started missing minimum payments to save money. My checking account (that my dad got me) stopped covering my overdrafts. My salon called-- the check had bounced. I had seven credit cards.

I called my dad for help. I tried to tell him that I had a problem but he didn't listen. I'd lied to him habitually about where my money went and this time he didn't even ask. My grandfather passed away around that time and with one tragic inevitable incident, my 15,000 slate was wiped clean... as well as all my student loans. I was a 22 year old college graduate with zero debt, ready to start (yet another) new life.

I'd like to say I learned a lesson from the shame of admitting my failure. I'd like to say that I finally realized that all I'd bought myself with credit cards was misery. But of course I didn't. I did something even more stupid...